So when you experience a breakup depending on how the breakup went, you may feel like you didn’t say everything you wanted to say.
You may feel like you have a lot more on your chest that you want to talk about, buuuut do you really need that closure?
Today we’re going to be talking about whether closure after a breakup is needed and how to get the closure you need.
Do you need closure after a breakup? | The Relationship Closure Conversation
So when it comes to wanting closure… I know I have been there.
I have been in situations where I wanted to share with an ex how I felt after things were said and done only to realize I had more to say.
I don’t know what it is, but after a couple days or a week after a breakup.. I end up realizing it’s so much stuff I wanted to say to them that I didn’t say during the actual breakup conversation.
However I’ll give you guys the blunt truth… a lot of times the things I would say would relate to them hurting my feelings or me secretly deep down hoping they’d change the the way they’d be and want to do things the right way with me where we could rekindle a relationship.
I’m here to tell you guys that trying to reach out to an ex after a breakup is a complete no go most of the time.
I say that for a few reasons.
Here’s why you shouldn’t reach out for closure after a breakup..
They might not care about what you have to say.
Depending on how things ended… they may just brush off everything you tell them.
You may want a response that you won’t get.
A lot of times many of us seek closure because we want the person to say..
“You’re right. I messed up. You’re such an amazing person and I don’t deserve you..”
It’s the way we might want validation that we were great to them.
Or we may want to hear..
I” shouldn’t have did that. I am so sorry I did, but I’d love to give it another chance if you want to. I promise to not hurt you again. I will do better for you. I’ll do better for us.”
Sometimes we want the person to just say they’ll change and try to work things out.
We want them to still fight for us, but they most likely won’t.
You may hope that by reaching out… your ex will put up a fight for you and see your worth.
You may think that telling them how you feel will inspire them to want to fight for the relationship..
However… don’t set yourself up for being let down.
Reaching out for closure isn’t real.
The concept that you have to reach out to the person who hurt you for closure is completely false.
Reaching out will more than likely only lead to more pain and more of you feeling upset about the situation.
Closure happens within you.
Closure is something that you have completely control over.
You may not be able to control how people treat your or see you or feel about you, but you can control how you cut off their access to you and the power they have over you.
Overall… take your time to grieve the relationship you were in.
It sucks and it’s okay to go through the motions.
Go through them and then let them go.
So that’s my 2 cents on whether you need closure from a breakup.
Have you been in a situation where you wanted closure?
Let me know in the comments down below!