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I have been in certain situations where I wondered whether I was being insecure or not.
I would question myself as to why I felt certain feelings or whether they were logical.
Today we’re going to dive into whether it’s insecurity or whether there is a current problem in your relationship.
Am I Insecure in my Relationship? – Are you insecure or should you be concerned? | Advice
When it comes to being insecure usually there isn’t any valid reasoning as to why you have doubts about your relationship or situation.
I know for me in past relationships, there were times when I would bring up a concern with a guy I was dating at the time and they would say I was being insecure for feeling a certain way… but in reality the way I was feeling was quite rational.
So how can you tell if you’re being insecure or rational in your theories that something is actually going on that shouldn’t be going on in your relationship?
Is something inappropriate happening?
Do you see flirtatious messages or interactions in person or even on social media?
Do they hide their whereabouts when it comes to where they are going?
Do they put in the effort to hide their phone?
Are they spending a lot of time with someone new that you know for a fact is technically their type?
Is your significant other not respecting the boundaries of your relationship?
Do they talk to this person of interest that you’re concerned about late at night or do they receive texts/calls from them after 11 PM at night?
Do they make advances and speak to them as if they are pursuing them?
Do they not want you to meet them and are being secretive about their relationship with this other person?
Have you caught them lying to you about something related to their relationship with someone else?
Were there any red flags that showed that you had reason to doubt your significant other?
If you found yourself saying Yes to any of these questions, then you have valid reasoning for feeling the way you do.
It wouldn’t be considered as being insecure unless you mean not feeling secure that your relationship is safe and that the person you’re with won’t do something disrespectful.
You and your partner definitely need to have a sit down and talk session where you share your concerns and valid reasoning for those concerns.
They should want to listen to you, hear you, and help you to feel better about the situation where you can start feeling safe emotionally and mentally about the relationship between the two of you.
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Now you could be insecure if the following is what you’re experiencing…
Are you creating situations from nothing?
Do you find yourself thinking the worse for no reason?
Do you find yourself wanting to accuse them of cheating or being with other people?
If you have anwered Yes to these questions, then you might want to consider evaluating why you feel the urge to think this way.
The reasons why your brain makes these accussations could be because of your past or even something more.
Have you been in past relationships or seen relationships where cheating happened?
You could be holding onto the past and bringing it into the present into your current relationship.
Therapy would be helpful within this situation.
I recommend BetterHelp if you would like to setup some virtual sessions by an actual professional who can help you to understand as well as come to terms with those insecurities.
Another thing that would be helpful is checking out one or two of these books about dealing with your personal insecurities and how to handle them so that they don’t become an issue within your relationship.
Book 1 – Insecure in Love: How to Dominate Yourself in Love to Overcome the Fear of Abandonment, Anxious Attachment, Save Your Codependent Relationship and Stop Controlling Others
Book 2 – Master Your Emotions: A Practical Guide to Overcome Negativity and Better Manage Your Feelings (Mastery Series)
Book 3 – Insecure in Love: How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It
Book 4 – Love Me, Don’t Leave Me: Overcoming Fear of Abandonment and Building Lasting, Loving Relationships
Book 5 – Insecure in Love: 4 Books in 1: Why do we Sabotage Love? How to Overcome Jealousy, Heartbreak, Anxiety and Fear of Abandonment before Killing your Relationship
So hopefully you guys found this helpful.
Feel free to comment down below if you have any thoughts on the topic.